Disconnecting

large_3234042719Whether it was fate or just a simple coincidence, my computer died last week. Impeccable timing to coincide with the move and the whole back to the land thing, eh?

It’s died on me in the past, but I’ve always managed to bring it back – not this time. I mean, If I really wanted to I could just replace the power supply to get it up and running. Still, I think that it’s about time that I just let it go. I had a good eight years out of that desktop and definitely got my money’s worth. Plus, Jeff and I have decided that it is for the best that we “disconnect” for sometime.

He still has his computer, though. He still doesn’t know how hard it is to go without one. Neither did I.

At first, I thought, “Well, it’s not like I use it THAT much. I’ll be fine without it”. Boy, was I wrong.

NO MORE COMPUTER

The first day, I spent a couple of hours messing with it and fiddling around desperately trying to get it working. After being unsuccessful and with nothing else to do, I just laid down in the corner and moped for the rest of the night.

All the while, Jeff was happily clicking away on his computer.

Sure, he offered to let me use his computer – it’s not the same! I want to randomly browse and watch videos, but people get crazy if you don’t have a specific reason for getting on their comps. You need a good excuse like “Hey, I need to check my email.” Whenever I did get on Jeff’s computer, I noticed that he gets fidgety and stares me down. I know that he desperately wants my computer to work because whenever I “borrow” his PC… he starts fiddling with my computer trying to get it to work.
After many failed attempts, he usually does the same thing that I do – mope in the corner, Hah! Oh and just in case anyone is wondering why the corner is the go-to-mope spot – our bed is in the corner.

IT WORKS! OH, NEVERMIND. IT’S DEAD.

A couple of days in, he managed to get my computer working. Balance was restored and it was a joyous time… until, it died again a few moments later.

I’ve tried to use my kindle fire to browse and watch videos, but it’s just not the same! I could go outside, but I’ve been so lazy and unmotivated lately.

I spend my time pacing around and considering buying a new computer. I’ve managed to fight the temptation because I need to save my money for when we are out in Arizona. Yet, I still keep trying to talk myself into purchasing a new computer!

origin_7607705630It’s so hard to be without any electronics. I mean, I’m not even fully disconnected and I’m going nuts!

ACCEPTANCE

I think at this point, I’m almost done with the computer withdrawals. I think I’m starting to come to terms with my loss, and have started to think about my new life in Arizona.

Jeff gave me a good pep talk yesterday. He reminded me of what a great opportunity to improve our quality of life we are getting, and all of the reasons why we chose to move in the first place. It made me feel better with the whole “being depressed about moving” thing.

So, if you are in my position and you are also starting to get cold feet, think about all of the reasons why you decided to leave and decide whether or not it really is the best decision for you and your family.

Don’t let fear hold you back from great things.

In the mean-time, I will practice what I preach and keep my chin up.

Thanks for reading!

P.S. Here is a picture of a cute kitty to brighten your day!

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One comment

  1. […] Things i should’ve known before i got my first apartment Flight booked but feeling depressed Disconnecting Goodbyes and Kitty on the […]

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